Staying the Course in the Face of Humiliation

The young pianist began with a flourish and played with gusto, when, of a sudden, she stopped, her hands poised over the keys. Was this a dramatic pause, I wondered. But the seconds piled up, and it was soon evident that the young pianist had lost her place.

What a frightening, harrowing moment, for one so young, I could only imagine.

But she kept her composure, focused herself, and I could see her mentally rehearsing the music, "Where am I? and how shall I continue?"

And, then she did.

She finished the piece with confidence, but when it was done, she stood to face the audience, did a very quick bow, her face distressed, and hurried off stage.

No doubt humiliated.

Before those of importance: her instructor was there, as was the girl's mother and grandmother, themselves pianists, with the mother both MC and accompanist, at a concert sponsored by the Pasadena Opera Guild, offering young singers and musicians and opportunity to perform, in honor of Grandmothers and Mothers.

She'll live with the humiliation for a few days, maybe even a week or two, but in time, it'll fade, but not the memory. We tend to recall moments of humiliation - it's a terrible feeling, with disappointment in ourselves, perhaps having let others down, and just the feeling, the ugly feeling of shame.

But in the moment, she didn't quit, she didn't flee ... she held her place and regained the music. She proved her mettle after all.

I hope she continues to play the piano. With mother and grandmother encouraging her, and her instructor to bolster her skills, I suspect she will.

I know who I am ...

There aren't enough negative words,
To describe what I think of DT.
And his cabinet.

But, damnit all, I'm not anyone else but me.
I know what I value.
I know what's important.

And I stand by all of that.
In season.
And out of season.

When Paul wrote to Timothy about seasons.
It's always hit me deeply.
There are seasons when things are just right.

And seasons when the bitter winds.
Of adversity and confusion.
Blow away the right.

But, heck, so what?
In season.
Out of season.

I'll stay the course.
Honor my values.
And love God.